Teacher [Milk] Tea: Part 1

It has come to our attention that many BISV students are well-versed in their teachers’ opinions of movies, animals, music, and so much more. But have you ever considered asking your teachers about their go-to milk tea order? What about their favorite stores they visit to obtain these drinks? Well, we have. This subject of great importance shall not be overlooked so hastily. In this detailed interview, two (self-proclaimed) professional boba connoisseurs have compiled some extremely interesting and enjoyable conversations they’ve had with BISV staff on their favorite boba drinks. You may find that you have more in common with some of your teachers than you thought. Some opinions may even surprise you! Looking for boba recommendations? Look no further than the opinions of your very own teachers. Whether you’re a novice, casual-enjoyer, or a well-seasoned veteran on this topic, the beau-tea of boba combined with the varie-tea of personalities of the BISV staff is sure to offer some of the highest quali-tea insight you’ll ever find. Now let’s get this par-tea started!

As we set off on our boba investigation, we knew we had to first inquire about the opinion of our very amazing club advisor, Ms. Shapiro, who showed much excitement and intrigue upon hearing about this topic. When asked what her favorite drink was, she responded, “Milk tea…but also fruity tea, regular ice, light on the sweetener is my jam.” We eagerly nodded upon hearing this statement, for there is much to be said about the unhealthy, oversaturated sugar content found in these drinks today. Ms. Shapiro then mentioned that she had tried the fruit tea that Ms. Odell had bought for her from Sunright Tea Studio, which she considered absolutely “delightful.” If you’re wondering whether or not to try out the tea at the Sunright Tea Studio near BISV, perhaps these words from Ms. Shapiro will convince you to finally do so! Though she claimed to be an “inexperienced topping person,” Ms. Shapiro was able to step out of her comfort zone and try the rather unusual topping choice of cheese: “It was suspicious at first, but I saw that it was more of a cream cheese rather than cheddar, and the foam was really nice.” Cheese on top of boba is truly an acquired taste, but if made right, can produce the perfect blend of sweet and salty that hits the tongue in just the right spot. We then proceeded to ask Ms. Shapiro about her favorite locations to get boba at, to which she replied with a contemplative expression, “I don’t know if I do because I…how do I say without sounding like a terrible person…I just don’t care about it enough to have a favorite.” However, upon further investigation, Ms. Shapiro seems to frequent Happy Lemon the most, a classic favorite among experienced boba connoisseurs. Perhaps she was not one with strong opinions on this topic, as it was hard for Ms. Shapiro to think of a reason for visiting this shop the most. Confused, she replied, “Cuz I found it? [confused Pikachu face]… the flavors are good…it seems legit…it just seems legit.” Well, fair enough. There needn’t always be profound reasons to like things, especially if said “thing” is as simple as a cup of boba milk tea. As for recommendations to our readers, Ms. Shapiro seemed to have an idea in mind at first but then became rather reluctant to reveal what it was. Instead, she told us, “I recognize this is not appropriate to say because you’re not of drinking age. It’s kinda similar to recommending wine… like you can’t really recommend it cause you just like what you like, you know…” I guess this leaves the answer to our imagination, but it’s probably for the better anyway. The next question that came up was on the topic of “red flags” when it came to different shops, which are simply particular traits that one might find as a turnoff when considering whether or not to visit again. This one seemed much easier to answer for Ms. Shapiro, who said with certainty, “When you walk into a boba store and it’s too quiet, there’s a problem.” Of course, good vibes are an extremely important part of all shops, for the number of customers and noisy chatter at a shop can act as an easy indicator of the quality of its drinks and service. Ms. Shapiro was then asked to give her opinion on Tea Up, the boba truck that regularly visits BISV on food truck festival days. After thinking for a bit, Ms. Shapiro replies, “Umm… so I like their tea, but I won’t order on our food truck days because he does them all premixed for his own sanity and it’s way too sweet. But the boba’s good and the tea’s fabulous! The family in there, hustling that boba.” Is this something that our readers can relate to? Or is the bliss of boba on a school day simply too tempting to resist? But on the topic of boba near BISV, Ms. Shapiro was happy to give her thoughts about Sunright Tea Studio. She originally had her eyes on the grapefruit jasmine tea, but later found it to be “too floral.” In the end, she settled on the Sunright Fruit Tea and loved it very much. She also mentioned seeing a matcha-flavored drink, to which an excited bystander exclaimed, “Matcha? I like matcha!” Ms. Shapiro then expressed suspicion at the yogurt/Yakult flavors, which indeed may not be a flavor for everyone’s liking. Finally, we decided to conclude with a few closing statements from Ms. Shapiro: “I enjoy boba. Just because I don’t drink very often doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy it. I have stuff to learn, and I am happy to be a student of boba.” Now we know that boba school has at least one very dedicated student. Is AP Comparative Boba and Politics on its way to joining the AP curriculum? As a final after-thought, she adds, “I’m excited to read whatever that [waves hand at our computers] turns into.” Us too.

On a rainy Thursday, we decided to seek shelter in Dr. Parson’s Period 5 office hours. We conveniently happened upon the topic of milk tea. Or maybe we just asked him if he had ever had boba before. Either way, Dr. Parson responded concisely with a simple “yes.” Before we even finished asking what his favorite drink was, he eagerly asserted “Lychee. Like I put lychee in it, and boba, and, I don’t know, milk, taro?” We can all learn something from his passion for lychee. It seems as if his love for toppings doesn’t only extend to lychee; on the contrary, his favorite topping is boba. Dr. Parson offered some wisdom only a true boba lover would possess: “I like sucking the [tapioca pearls].” When he was asked by a bystander to specify which ones, he proudly proclaimed “brown.” Perhaps he just really enjoys brown sugar boba? We’re not really sure about that one. Despite the insight we gained into Dr. Parson’s mysterious preferences, we were determined to learn more. Upon further investigation, we determined that he, quite suspiciously, does not have a favorite boba shop. He firmly believes that “only weirdos have favorite boba shops. Boba is boba.” (Disclaimer: The Quill does not in any way, shape, or form endorse that statement.) Dr. Parson continued along this path of controversial opinions by declining to inform us of drinks he would recommend. As for his favorite boba place, he solemnly declared it was “one that sells boba.” That is a statement that we can all agree with. Since he is known for being concise, he surprised us with his most verbose opinion thus far when asked about his red flags when it comes to drinks or shops: “If they have the machine that does it all—like the cup and sealing—that’s a no-go. Like, guys, you’re only making drinks. Good lord. It’s gotta be an easy business.” His voice was absolutely dripping with disdain. We at The Quill do not recommend finding a part-time job at a franchise notorious for automating their processes, for there is the ever-present risk of Dr. Parson seeing you there. Trust us, that would not be a friendly confrontation. We concluded our interrogation by inquiring about his thoughts on Tea Up, the boba truck that regularly visits BISV. We had Dr. Parson—usually someone who’s very opinionated—stuck on this one. He contemplated his life for a bit, then got back to us: “Never had it. Oh, no I had it once. I don’t know what is my opinion. Is it overpriced?” [We may or may not have influenced Dr. Parson on this one by answering in the affirmative.] “Maybe that’s my opinion.” As always, we try to ascertain the quality of our extremely nuanced and well-developed questions. However, when we asked if he had any final comments, Dr. Parson replied with a resounding “No. It’s a stupid survey.” We see that Dr. Parson is passionately embracing the spirit of a contrarian! We wished him the best of luck in his new profession or passion project or whatever it may be, and bid him farewell. Dr. Parson sure does have some hot takes. Too bad he doesn’t like hot boba. 

Our next victim who kindly responded to our request for an interview was boba non-enthusiast Dr. Wang. We thought some diversity would be nice—everyone should have the opportunity to divulge their opinion on boba! The Quill is a very inclusive environment. She elaborated that, not only has she drunk boba before, but also “If you give me one right now I’ll probably drink it if it’s not too sweet.” We approve. That is a very wise choice. People who order their drinks at 100% sweetness probably either have no taste buds or they haven’t been activated yet. Dr. Wang eagerly and adamantly informed us of her go-to drink: “Just green tea boba. Green tea. Green tea milk tea.” Green is a color that is reminiscent of the esteemed poet Walt Whitman, someone who contains multitudes; therefore, Dr. Wang’s choice is undoubtedly a good one. She continues with her distaste for sugar—and, apparently, toppings—by explaining “I don’t like toppings. Just pure milk tea. No sugar. Like zero sugar. Unsweetened.” It’s no surprise that her favorite place is Fantasia Coffee and Tea, a Bay Area staple since the 20th century (and by that, we mean 1997). Dr. Wang especially likes the fact that they “don’t have fancy stuff. Is that a good reason?” [We assure her that it’s perfectly valid.] “I don’t like fancy stuff. Nowadays, they create different variations of boba. I just prefer it the classic, original way.” It’s an oldie but a goodie! Sometimes, we all need some simple green milk tea in our lives. However, she soon surprised us by recalling that “it’s been several years since I’ve drunk boba. I’m not a boba tea person. It’s hard for me to think.” Yet after thinking very hard for a couple of minutes, Dr. Wang returns with an answer; to a rookie boba connoisseur, she would recommend “just the classic version of milk tea with no toppings added.” You definitely can’t go wrong with that. If you do, maybe you’re not just cut out for this type of life. Her previous opinion perfectly aligns with her red flags when it comes to boba places—when a place has many multifarious multitudes of selections: “It’s hard to make a choice.” As one of us is a Libra, we are fully empathetic. There should be a career role of “decision-maker,” perchance. It would be very profitable. She leaves us with some wise words of advice: “I would not order by myself. Sometimes my husband will order for me. But never by myself.” Maybe it’s just a byproduct of being a boba non-enthusiast? Or maybe we’ll never know. 

And on that note, we conclude our interviews. If you are disappointed that this article is ending, do not fear, we completely agree. Which is why we’ve decided to be so kind and gracious by continuing this series with a part 2! Stay tuned for insights from new victims, and perhaps even some cameos by our old cast! Will Dr. Wang ever buy boba by herself, of herself, and for herself (we are aware that does not make grammatical sense but we’re trying to be rhetorical; bear with us please)? Will Dr. Parson ever admit that our carefully cul-tea-vated survey is amazing? You may find answers in the sequel. Or you may not. If we’ve learned one thing from these boba enthusiasts, it’s that varie-tea truly is everything. 

Source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/mr_t_in_dc/3478078559