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The Quill

How to _____ On Spring Break

Previously published May 20. 2021

Previously published May 20. 2021

Disclaimer: The Bunion is not responsible for any bad grades, missed homework, angry teachers, or vacationing accidents this Spring Break. May you always read a Bunion and never actually have a Bunion.


Go to the Beach


Don’t. Protect others. Protect yourself. Stay safe.


Go on a Hike


Wear a mask. Yes, in the heat. After all, who wouldn’t want to get rid of all the water, ammonia, urea, salts, and sugars out of their body? You’ll have a six-pack in no time!

Go for a Swim


Might as well go with your friends so you can detoxify yourself from the virus together in the pool; it’s just like washing your hands without soap in an enormous sink.


Spend Time with your Family


Walk out of your room. I know this step can be arduous, but it is necessary in order to communicate with your family members


Go Skiing


If you’re interested in sliding on rocks with sticks attached to your feet, then go for it!

Eat at a Restaurant


Cut a hole in your mask for the food to go in, along with all of the coronavirus particles floating around. Or just take the food to go.




Eggs and butter you must acquire, In order to set the house on fire.


Watch a Movie


Take a blanket. Bring some cookies. Start a Zoom meeting and wait 105 minutes for your only friends to join, then give up and binge Keeping Up with the Kardashians on your own.


Have a Sleepover


It wouldn’t be a proper sleepover without the classic “Bloody Mary 3x” in front of the mirror.




Don’t bother. We all know you were studying for APs/Comps during Spring Break anyways, you high-achieving BISV student.

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