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The Raid Against Mar-a-Lago

Previously Published Oct. 13, 2022
The+Raid+Against+Mar-a-Lago
 
August 12th, 2022, a day that will live in infamy. The home of The Current and True President, The Persecuted, The Survivor, The Incredible, The Unifier, The Warrior of Our Broken Nation, Donald John Trump, was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the Empire of the extreme left. The Extreme Left’s Secret Police Force, the FBI, an evil force unprecedented in corruption and dictatorial intent, has launched an unjustified and Gestapo-like assault against the beautiful, luxurious, presidential palace Mar-a-Lago. Promulgated by the extreme left, who have a deep, unjustified animosity toward Donald Trump and no sympathy for the well-being of the people, the attack on the President’s home is a blatant attempt to remove him from candidacy and to challenge the clear supremacy of the Republican Party. To prove this, let facts be submitted to a conservative world.
They have denied His Truly viewing access to the search of his home, a basic right that is given to every citizen as handsome as he.
They have denied The President congregation with his friends and allies for reasons as insignificant as the committing of a minor felony.
His Grace has been denied the basic right to lie to Congress, something every citizen as powerful or as rich or as famous or as popular or as white as he is should be given the right to do.
They have besieged His Majesty’s home for the sole reason of possessing documents pertaining to national security.
They have taken over His Highness’s home and ransacked his safes and searched his stashes upon stashes of the most precious Kentucky Fried Chicken only to find already declassified documents that will prove EXCLUSIVELY almost NOTHING about his guilt.
The Extreme Left is now in the process of mobilizing men and material against him, and with the unrelenting fury that they pursue imaginary figures like climate change, so do they pursue the imaginary threat of an America ruled by Emperor Donald Trump.
But you may be asking, why does this issue come up now? The attack commenced and concluded on the same day more than a month before. Well, I’ll tell you why. When the forces of the extreme left first stepped foot into Mar-a-Lago, dark storm clouds rolled over the nation and evil ravaged the land. That day has still left destruction in its path, and in every one of us the ravaged land clouds our mind and eats away at our senses until only those who still remains sane see what the extreme left has done to this once great nation. The White House threatens to raise a Specter over America! The Specter of Communism! The only barrier between us and that fate is this man, the Persecuted, the Survivor, Donald Trump! And for the greater America, this evil of the extreme left must be destroyed. To do this, we will return Trump to his former glory, and he will use his unparalleled might to eradicate the extreme left. We the people can end this. You the poor, the persecuted, the unimportant can choose to rise up against this tyranny by bringing Donald Trump back to power.
Now we approach the true reason for the raid against the Imperial Palace Mar-a-Lago. The extreme left is afraid. Not only is the extreme left afraid, the White House is afraid. Congress is afraid. Even Republicans are afraid! THEY ARE COWARDS! UNDESERVING OF THE ELEPHANT! Just as they watched the extreme left destroy the home of Trump, and therefore threaten the sanctity of the party, now they watch as the them prepares a second round against him.
Be sure to know that we are not afraid! Why this invigorates us, for Our Glorious Leader will lead us to victory over everyone! Even now, as this article is in the making, Mr. Trump is formulating a counter strategy. Matching move for move, hit for hit, and plotting a deep pit so deep that even the extreme left will die in fear as they hit the bottom. They will not escape! They cannot. The plan is too intricate, the pieces so many, that the they will not be able to climb out of this pit of pronounless doom. In fact, they are already in it! They merely do not see it! The net that has enveloped them all slowly carries the establishment and everyone with it to the doom they brought upon themselves when they decided to launch this comical assault against the walls of the Imperial Palace.
Before they are destroyed, they will look up once more, to the America left behind as they have been removed from it, and they will see a great America, a powerful America, and a more perfect America. They will regret ever opposing Trump, and those who supported Trump will finally see the retribution they deserve dealt upon the persecutors.
He will be back.
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Maximilian Guo, Staff Writer

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