As the new year rolls into motion, so do the annual traditions of setting the unrealistic-but-I’ll-do-it-one-day New Year’s Resolutions: cleaning half of your room and “saving” the other half for when you feel productive again (which won’t roll around until next year), or finally getting rid of your procrastination issue by procrastinating until you feel ready!
But no.
I refuse to let you fall down this path yet another year. This year, you’re changing your mindset.
Remember your resolutions from last year, how you tried to achieve them but never managed to piece together the steps to get you there? It wasn’t necessarily a “you” problem, more of a “your approach” problem. And that’s OK! After all, you’re asking yourself to go from zero to a hundred, which is anything but realistic.
That brings me to step one to reframing your mindset: Break it down.
Envision yourself at the end of this year. What are your habits? How do you behave, act, and think? As you piece together this image of yourself, drawing out traits the “ideal” version of yourself has, start to break down your habits into monthly steps. If you were to work towards this goal each month, how would you progress? Then, start to delegate daily tasks, but remember to be realistic and lenient on yourself. For inspiration, this can be meditating every day for ten minutes, then gradually increasing the time each month to work towards becoming more mindful and in tune with yourself by the end of the year. The point of this exercise is not only to build the idea of yourself achieving these goals, but also to build the system that will help you adopt these habits. Et voilà! That’s step one complete; let’s keep moving.
Step two: Build it up (awareness, that is).
As you set out on our journey to become the ideal version of yourself, it’s easy to get distracted or have your vision altered with a simple swipe of a reel and a scroll through a short. Comparison is the thief of joy, yet even when knowing such, sometimes our minds subconsciously slip into a battle of “why can’t I get grades like that” or “I need to act just like that person.” There’s a fine line between inspiration and comparison, and as you progress in your journey to become a better version of yourself, it’s important you realize this. After all, there’s no point in comparing yourself to random people you see, as you will never be just like them. To illustrate, your friend may have gotten a high score in a game by gaming all night and surviving on Red Bull, but that doesn’t mean the only way to get a high score in the game is to do the same. Stick to your principles; other people will appreciate someone with a backbone and an actual personality.
Instead of emulating other people, try to appreciate them for who they are. Look past the tangible eye-candy and pay attention to what really matters: their personality. Yes, yes, as cliché as this sounds, you must spend your time among morally sound people who not only inspire you to be a better version of yourself but also support you in your endeavors. We’re all so different, and realizing that it’s the diversity that makes the world such an interesting place will allow you to approach the next stranger you see with a different perspective.
Dragging this point onwards, leaning into what makes you unique will define the line between comparison and influence even more. Only after setting up your priorities and goals can you achieve mental clarity that allows you to explore niche things you enjoy. Not into Sonny Angels? No problem! Really interested in Labubus? As Megan Thee Stallion says, “You do you and whatever that is.” But in all seriousness, truly take the time to focus on your goals, take actual steps in the direction to work towards achieving them, and allow others to get there their own way, as variety is the spice of life. You won’t be the happiest when you’re chasing after what others around you want; you’ll be the happiest when you’re chasing after what you genuinely desire.
Well, that was a mouthful, but it was an important mouthful. Let’s wrap it up with…
Step three: Get some hobbies, man!
Up until now, we’ve spoken about setting up goals, not getting swayed to diverge from personal goals by comparing yourself to someone else, so now, let’s talk about spending time offline for a change. In the interconnected world we live in with so much going on all the time, it feels so easy to scroll on YouTube Shorts, TikTok, Instagram Reels, Pinterest, RedNote– need I go on? In tandem with step two, getting off social media or media in general can be a refreshing reset to your mind that will allow you to focus back on yourself. As you make these subtle mindset shifts, I urge you to explore new off-screen activities. Personally, I’m striving to overthink a lot less by trying journaling, which has allowed my mind to be put at ease! I have also reignited my love for puzzles, learning to slow down in life and appreciate the little moments that create the big picture. It’s truly the seasoning of side quests that adds all the spice to a slice of life.
By implementing these three steps this year, you’re bound to have an adventurous and enlightening new year ahead of you! As we part ways for now, I’ll leave you with this:
Not the pursuit of happiness but the happiness of pursuit – enjoy the process, pause, and smell the roses.
Gia, out (mic-drop).
